Basic Cable

Season	s23
Episode	e09
Written By	Trey Parker
Production Code	2309
Original Air Date	2019-12-4

Episode Chronology

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Christmas Snow

Official Description

Scott Malkinson's future with the new girl in his class depends on him getting the latest and greatest streaming platform. Scottâ€™s dad works for the local cable company and refuses to move beyond basic cable.

Full Description

Fourth grader Scott Malkinson asks his father Clark, a technician for Park County Cable, if they can subscribe to the streaming service Disney+. Clark angrily rebukes him for again making this request, telling him that the cable television they have is sufficient, and that he is tired of the growing popularity of streaming media. As Clark storms off to work, Scott, who has Type 1 diabetes, realizes that the stress of his father's rant has caused his blood sugar to rise, and self-administers a shot of insulin.

At South Park Elementary, the Fourth Grade class learns that the newest student, a girl named Sophie Gray, who also has diabetes. As Scott's friends are always ridiculing him for having diabetes, Scott believes she is perfect for him, and declares that he is in love with her. When the other boys also express an interest in her, Scott angrily resolves that he will not allow them to ruin this opportunity for him. He embarks upon a campaign of sabotaging the efforts of other boys to court her in order to woo her himself. When he learns that she is an avid fan of the Disney+ series The Mandalorian, he feigns a matching interest in it. When she suggests watching the next episode at Scott's house, Scott agrees, despite not having Disney+.

Clark receives word of a job. Despite the fact that business has been suffering in part because of customer complaints of slow service, Clark spends his day leisurely eating his lunch at the park, and going bowling. This laxness and procrastination he displays in the face of important obligations serves as a recurring gag in the episode. When he arrives at the residence of Stephen and Linda Stotch 15 minutes after the end of a five-hour estimated service window, an irritated Chris Stotch complains, and threatens to quit cable in favor of streaming. When Clark says that streaming is destroying their town, Chris insists that it may nonetheless be an option he may consider. When Scott again asks his father for a subscription for his date with Sophie, Clark again refuses, and contacts his coworkers to conspire to sabotaging the streaming services in South Park, though he arranges to meet with them in a window between 10am and 2pm on Thursday.

Clark rallies his co-workers, complaining that he hasn't had a full day of work in weeks, and points out to them that the streaming services use the cable that they laid throughout the town. He says they should disrupt that infrastructure, in order to show the townsfolk how much they still need them. When Clark's coworkers agree, he delegates assignments to each of them, but says they should meet at a designated point between 4pm and 7pm. The cable repairmen take advantage of this three-hour window by engaging in a number of leisurely personal activities. This angers Clark, who repeatedly tells them that they should not make a practice of keeping appointments at the very end of windows several hours long, but Clark nonetheless continues this habit himself.

Scott buys a black market Disney+ login for his date with Sophie. But as Clark and his colleagues vandalize the cable lines running throughout town, Scott's account stops working. Sophie suggests going to Jimmy Valmer's house, where their other classmates are gathered to watch the show, though Scott fears this may threaten his attempts to woo Sophie. However, Jimmy's streaming service also malfunctions, as do those of everyone else in town. When the boys attempt to ingratiate themselves to Sophie, Scott threateningly brandishes several hypodermic needles, warning the other boys to stay away from his girlfriend. Sophie, however, informs Scott that having diabetes does not make her his girlfriend, as she is more than just that condition. This prompts a dejected Scott, who concedes that he is not, to retreat to a playground to mope. A sympathetic Sophie appears there, however, to commiserate with him over the difficulties diabetics like them live with each day, simply to live normal lives. She tells him that she is glad she now has a friend that she can talk who understands these issues, and that even though she missed the latest episode of The Mandalorian, she somewhat likes The Scott Malkinson Show.

A closing title card informs the viewer that the streaming rights for The Scott Malkinson Show are now available, complete with an actual phone number with which prospective buyers can contact Trey Parker, much to the frustration of Clark.