Story

Description

When Stan and Kyle find Cartman crying in front of his locker at school, he explains that he's upset about the essay Mr. Garrison assigned, "What I Want to Be When I Grow Up." He wails that he dreams of being a NASCAR driver, but "a person like him" could never be that–he's nowhere near poor and stupid enough to be a NASCAR driver or fan. Immediately he turns to Kenny, who innocently confirms that he is a huge NASCAR fan. Dismayed at Cartman's views of NASCAR, Kenny, and himself, Stan and Kyle effectively convince him that he's actually very poor and very stupid.

Cartman immediately turns to Butters for help in becoming as poor and stupid as possible: he gives Butters all his money and orders him to spend it all and never give it back. Then, while watching what he hopes is brain-cell-killing TV programming, he sees a commercial for Vagisil that lists short-term memory loss as a possible side effect, so he shoplifts some and consumes it (quite literally, as he eats the cream meant for topical use).

On race day, Butters convinces a driver to abandon his car because his wife has been raped, and Cartman hops into his car, but his total lack of knowledge causes an accident that lands him in the hospital. The doctor comments to Cartman, who's disappointed that he is not more seriously injured than he is, that his accident was the stupidest he has ever seen, which restores Cartman's hope. His antics cause the news media to wonder if all NASCAR fans are as stupid as he seems to be. This infuriates Kenny, and begins to take serious matters into his own hands.

Kenny, incensed and furious, storms to Cartman's house just in time for a visit from Vagisil founder Geoff Hamill and his wife Patty. Since Cartman's determination has brought considerable attention to Vagisil, Hamill rewards him with his own Vagisil-sponsored racecar, further galling Kenny.

Before his first race, Cartman posts bigoted and ignorant statements on his podcast and the media concludes that "NASCAR really is just for the poor and stupid". Kenny decides that he must put a stop to Cartman. He tries to smuggle a hunting rifle into the racetrack, but it gets confiscated. He is however reassured that he can buy another in the gift shop.

At Cartman's first race in his Vagisil car, he drives badly, crashing into other drivers, pulling Danica Patrick under the wheel, and mowing down spectators. When Kenny tries to interrupt, he's knocked onto the track; 2 cars crash to avoid him, leaving Cartman's the only car remaining in the race. Suddenly, Patty Hamill, fed up of her husband's disrespectful and condescending remarks toward her, gets onto the track and takes Jimmie Johnson's damaged car. She beats Cartman and wins the race, much to Hamill's sheer disappointment, now that his company is ruined. Cartman apologizes to Kenny (who, surprisingly is still alive) for trying to become a NASCAR driver, and gives his future up, still believing that he is too smart for NASCAR. He demands that Butters give back his money, then yells at him for having done what he was told and gotten rid of it. Kenny watches in disbelief and confusion.

Characters

Stan Marsh

Kyle Broflovski

Eric Cartman

Kenny McCormick

Butters Stotch

Dale Earnhardt Jr.

Danica Patrick

Jeff Gordon

Jimmie Johnson

Matt Kenseth

Tony Stewart

Jeff and Patty Hamill

Pit Crewman

Lowes Pit Boss

Locations

Colorado National Speedway

Behind The Scenes

Pop Culture References

The episode satirizes stereotypes associated with the NASCAR community. In the episode, Cartman claims that all NASCAR drivers and fans are poor and stupid, and that he too must become so in order to become a NASCAR driver. The NASCAR drivers are portrayed as well-spoken and the NASCAR fans are depicted as being fairly smart; it is only Cartman's stereotypical impersonation of the NASCAR community that casts them in a negative light.

Bonus Factoids

Season 14

e1 Sexual Healing

e2 The Tale of Scrotie McBoogerballs

e3 Medicinal Fried Chicken

e4 You Have 0 Friends

e5 200

e6 201

e7 Crippled Summer

e8 Poor and Stupid

e9 It's A Jersey Thing

e10 Insheeption

e11 Coon 2: Hindsight

e12 Mysterion Rises

e13 Coon vs. Coon & Friends

e14 Creme Fraiche