Mr. Mackey
| Gender | Male |
| Age | 48 |
| Hair Color | Black |
| Occupation | School Counselor |
| Religion | Roman Catholic |
| Voiced by | Trey Parker |
| First Appearance | Mr. Hankey, the Christmas Poo |
Mr. Mackey is South Park Elementary's school counselor. He's always trying to dispense helpful knowledge to the kids on a wide variety of topics -- ranging from sex education to therapy sessions. He briefly experimented with drugs, which are bad, in "Ike's Wee Wee". And he had a pretty hot and heavy relationship with Miss Choksondik in "Proper Condom Use". Mkay?
Life Lessons
- ” So just try and STAY POSITIVE, stay away from DRUGS AND ALCOHOL, and in the meantime, I’m going to put you on a HEAVY REGIMEN OF PROZAC.”
- ” “QUEEF” is a vaginal expulsion of gas, mkay.”
- ” Yeah, I tell you boys… women can kill. That’s why when it comes to chicks, I just screw them and leave ‘em. I say, “Get out my bedroom, poontang, before you suck my life dry!”