Paul Watson
Paul Watson
Gender | Male |
Age | 63 |
Hair Color | Gray |
Occupation | Animal Rights Activist |
Successor | Stan Marsh |
First Appearance | Whale Whores |
About
A radical animal rights' activist and leader of the Sea Shepard Conservation Society, Watson was the illegally self-proclaimed Admiral of their fleet and Captain of the MV Steve Irwin. In his show Whale Wars, he claimed to be a badass pirate fighting a war against animal cruelty when all he really did was throw stinky butter at Japanese people. He was universally panned for being "an unorganized incompetent media whore who thought lying to everyone was okay as long as it served his cause" according to Larry King, and according to television expert Sid McDonahue, "a smug, narcoleptic liar with no credibility". He was killed by a Japanese whaling fleet, giving rise to Stan Marsh's leadership of the Sea Shepard Society, but later granted clemency by Satan for Tom Cruise's class-action lawsuit.
Memorable Quotes
- "Yeah, we're badass." (Whale Whores)
- "All right, so... what do we do? Wait, I know. How about we go on their ship, and then beat ourselves up? And then we can tell the media they did it?" (Whale Whores)
- "Wait, wait wait. I've got a better idea. How about I pretend to be shot? Then we can tell the media the Japanese shot me, a-and start an international c-crisis?" (Whale Whores)
- "People think our methods are extreme. But we'll keep making their boats stink as long as they're killing whales and dolphins!" (Whale Whores)
Featured Episodes
- Whale Whores (s13e11)
- 200 (s14e05; cameo)
- 201 (s14e06; cameo)
Fun Facts
- In reality, he is Canadian, but like Justin Bieber, Alanis Morisette and many other Canadian celebrities, he is rendered as a traditional Caucasian character.
- The real Paul Watson approved of the episode and was not particularly troubled by his portrayal, claiming he'd rather he and his crew be viewed as "pussies" rather than killers.